My first skin flick

Hey!!! I'm here. I came on October 16 at 6:21 pm. My mom keeps calling me a butterball because I was 8 pounds, three ounces and only 18 inches long. What did she expect? She's only 65 inches long and not much of that is in the middle!!! That's me up there in the video. Thanks, dad, for making my first skin flick just moments after my first breaths. Paris Hilton's got nothing on me!!!

You might have heard there was a lot of hoopla surrounding my arrival. I really didn't want to come out but they made me. First they tried drugging my mother but I wouldn't budge. Have you ever seen the width of a size four pelvis? You wouldn't want to stick your perfectly round head and flat ears in there either!!! So I wouldn't. Yep, I stood my ground for 18 hours. Who says Libras can't be stubborn? Maybe I'll grow up to be one of those crazy Greenpeace women tied to an old growth tree someday.

In the end they had to cut mom open and lift me out. Dad watched. I saw him first. He needed a shave but otherwise looked pretty happy to see me. Did you know he's bald? I never knew that. He was the first to tell me I was a girl. Of course, I already knew that.

I spent the first couple of nights with mom in the hospital then I got a fever and the doctors took me away to a place with really tiny babies in incubators. I think they wanted to make me feel fat or lucky or something. It worked. They poked and prodded and couldn't find anything wrong with me so I finally got to come home yesterday. My parents just stared at me so I toyed with them a bit - testing different cries, teaching them that I don't like a wet diaper and that when I want milk, I want it NOW. I also taught them I like to be held a lot and that if they do everything I tell them to I will reward them with three hours of silence.

Finally, much to my relief, I was not named Lentil Bean. They keep calling me that, but I saw them write down Sarah Addison McQuillen on the birth certificate. I heard that Sarah means "Princess" and Addison means "Awesome" so I'm thinking of changing the blog name to The Adventures of Princess Awesome. What do you think?